If you know me, you know that I am open, loud and whatever else. I float to the beat of my own drum and have never really thought too much or too long about what others think of me. Of course I care and have cared, but rarely did I let that affect my decisions in the long run. So now that those of you who didn’t know that are up to date, let me proceed to what this post is about. My “realness“.
Everyone knows that I speak my mind. I can be harsh, confrontational, blunt etc. So in my nature, I want to clarify some things. Yes, I am saved. Yes, I am crazy. Yes, I am fun. Yes, I am a hippie at heart. Yes, I burp,..a lot. Yes, I like to talk about gas and poop and other “gross” stuff. Yes, I used to party…a lot. Yes, I had sex…a lot. Yes, I used to drink…a TON.
I’ve been racking my brain on if I should reveal some of these things, and honestly this isn’t even half of it. My question to myself has been, “How “real” should you be?” Do you tell the stuff that you think about, the experiences you’ve had? Or just where you are now?
I decided that I have to trust my spirit. I’m really letting God and my heart decide what I should reveal. I know there are some secrets that I will NEVER tell…but then again even some of those might come to light later if I feel it’s necessary. But to hide what makes me, ME, seems so unlike me. I didn’t go through these things to be quiet and besides I’m not a quiet person…AT ALL. I was bold in sin and I’ll stay bold in salvation.
This blog is my public journal. A declaration that through my mess, God kept me. It’s a record of my struggles; raw and unfiltered. I’m choosing to let you all into the mind of Faithe, even the crazy thoughts. I do this because I need this. This is my therapy. My outlet. I don’t care what the responses are because I worry not about judgement from people. I’ve always only been scared of God and HIS wrath and judgement.
I write with my heart open and emotions swelling. I feel every word, after all this is MY life. I’m smart enough to know that I have to be careful so not to glamorize my past lifestyle, but what I won’t do is hide it or ignore it. I want people to learn from it; what not to do and sometimes what to do.
Maybe through my honesty people will realize that if you want to get through things you have to speak up. You have to be open in your communication with God and with people. But most importantly, you have to be honest to yourself, only then can you deal with you. So adjust yourselves accordingly as I “keep it real”, because God got me!!!
P.S. ‘scuse me in advance if some of my future posts seem off the wall, vulgar, unladylike especially for a Christian woman. You have to understand, this is new to me, sure there may be some changes/adjustments, but mentally I’m not there yet. I’m not going to fake it like I am. I’m learning and I will make mistakes, so I won’t apologize for what “may” happen. However if something I say/do offends you, take it to God and God alone. ~Smooches!!!